Tomorrow

I'm done packing. Almost. The suitcase is full, 22,8kg. And I feel great. No I don't. I have no idea how I feel.

23 kg isn't much, but that's all I'm allowed to take. And from what I've seen of the dorm rooms online, I won't have room for much more anyway. I packed my favourite sweater, my favourite shoes, my teddy bear and some other stuff. No books. Books are heavy.
Now all I have to do is pack everything I'm leaving at home in boxes and put those boxes in the basement.
I feel a little homeless right now. Weird. I'm writing this on my former roomies notebook, at my old place. Two weeks ago I moved back in with my mom so I wouldn't have to pay rent for August, but I don't feel at home in the guest room. And my old place isn't "my place" anymore either. So now I'm ready to have a new home on the other side of th world. Tomorrow.

The last two weeks consisted entirely of goobyes and until tonight I didn't cry. I just couldn't. I had this big fat knot in my stomach, I couldn't eat and had crazy nightmares, but I didn't cry. So tonight, when the suitcase was full, I came here to freak out a little and cry a little. Now that I've done that I feel a lot better and ready to leave.

Now I'll ride my bike home for the last time. Pack the last boxes and spend the last night in Germany. For one year. Every now and then I have to remind myself, that it's only a year. And let's face it, thanks to facebook I'll know what everybody is up to anyway an the other way around.

So that's it. The next time you'll here from me I will be very far away. And I'll be good!